You might not be interested reading this entry...
This does not contain any updates on the technology today...
Or movie reviews that I have watched lately...
I just want to share a piece of my life, hoping that someone would see things and understand why i am like this now...
These experiences made me eager about things in life, personally the future to come...

I am an only child and from the time I get to understand my existence in this world, I could recall events that really devastate me... happenings that could not be easily forgotten for it is so terrible... tortures my mind and torments my heart...

I would consider myself a bad son for hating my dad... but you can't blame me... you can't blame someone for hating his dad because he was physically and emotionally insulted... When I was a kid, I try to keep my Voltron robots ad vintage matchboxes in a nice cabinet, where i could see it everytime I go home from school... One by one, they were gone... They have to be gone for my dad. They are the one sacrificed to sustain my dad's obsessions...

My mom, I love her so much, she sacrificed a lot... for me, for my dad, for our family... but she is no super hero, she has to decide if to hold on or not... She asked me if what she would do, I told her to do the thing that would make her happy... I don't know how would I thank her for all those things... I am not a sweet son... I don't kiss her anymore, i don't give her a tight hug, I don't say "I love you mom"... I want to do it, but I don't know how... I don't know what stops me from doing so... This crashes my heart... when I see my mom dealing with problems in life... She even left her own problems, when she learned that I was engaged in a very BIG dilemma...

I hate my dad, but i don't loathe him... He's still my dad, and I am glad he changed for the better...

I just wish I could turn back time and try to save the family from being broken... but I can't, nothing and no one can... I just have to accept this and contiue to live life...

This may be shallow, I just don't know how to express it fully... but I hope I would inspire some readers... Love your parents and don't hate them if they would not allow you to go a party, they only think of the best things for you...

To my relatives and friends, thanks for being there always... ;) I just wish I could give back the help you offered...